The media. We all know they are biased against paleo. Everything from the Financial Review, to Quadrant to women's magazines to the bloody MJA. I've copped a fair beating in the press recently from the pro-purple lizard people and their GMO newsprint.
While I'm a freakin superstar on the facebook I've decided that the only way to beat journalists is to join them. That's mainly because actually beating people is 'illegal' because of cenozoic 'laws' that just didn't exist in paleolithic times.
Anyway, without any further fondue, here is some very exciting news for my tribe.
The launch of my new media empire: PALEO-QUACK WEEKLY MAGAZINE!
This great new ancient magazine is chock-full* of pro-paleo research I just found in my belly-button lint!
Find out tips on how to rob people blind selling false hope and miracle cures that can cure everything from cancer to a very bad case of purple lizardy skin!
Get the latest cavewoman fashion tips, including which loincloth you should wear the next time you want him to club you over the head.
Discover new paleolithic alternatives to vaccination, including dying in childbirth.
PQW isn't afraid to ask the hard questions like:
- Which way is up?
- Why is gluten actually Zyklon B?
- How to make an awesome paleo polonium b sandwich?
- Is that previous question actually a question? and
- How freaking awesome is Pete Evans and how can I give him more cash?
For the discount price of $99 per issue, you too can destroy your critical thinking abilities and look like a complete freak to your mates.
To sign up, just send a signed and sealed cave painting to me at firstname.lastname@example.org
Its probably safer than smashing yourself in the face with one of my chemical-free frypans and almost as expensive.
"Paleo-Quack Weekly - We're for pseudoscience."
*NOTE - Does not contain chocolate or any chocolate products. You may only eat organic carob and cry into your tepid organic kombucha.
Follow me on twitter: @peteevansnot